People aren’t always (ever) what you want them to be.
I think this could be one of the most frustrating things about growing up. Knowing, somewhere, this person has a side in them that’s perfect for you. I don’t just mean perfect for you as in boyfriend/girlfriend I could spend the rest of my life with you, I mean perfect as in helping complete some little piece of your life that might be a little bit incomplete. It’s not always significant, and more often than not you can cope just fine with that bit of incompleteness.
But have you ever met someone, or got to know someone, and known there’s that compatibility in there? Sometimes it’s just browsing their Twitter for a few minutes. There’s just something that resonates with you. Something that makes you want to go to a bar and sit and drink and just listen to them; to their stories, their experiences, their knowledge or their jokes. You want to ask them questions about what their goals are in life, what political party they stand for and what character trait makes them angrier than any other. But you can’t do any of that because they aren’t quite that person that you need them to be. Almost, but not quite.
Maybe it stems from social media- you can feel like you know someone that you don’t actually know at all. And when you remember that you get a little bit lost because it’s like having a friend in school who suddenly moves to another country. Peoples lives are already set; they have their plans and their routines and you’re not supposed to be the one that disrupts that. Don’t break the norm, people don’t like that….
But there’s that little part of that person, or people, that is something you need, or that little something you like. It might be a classmate who keeps asking the questions you’re thinking of too. It might be the adult who has all the knowledge you want but doesn’t think you’re worth sharing it with. It might be the guy with messy brown hair who knows just what to say when you’re feeling down, but goes quiet for weeks on end. The cool girl from your gym who tweets the lyrics from a band you thought no one else knew. The friend who always comes to you for advice but keeps making the same mistakes anyway. The person that is there for you when no one else is, but treats other people like shit.
The point is, most people have good in them. And sometimes you can see that good when not many others can… and maybe they don’t even want to see it themselves. That’s when it’s frustrating. Unfortunately, that little bit of them that you think is in there isn’t always a reflection of who they are. Just because someone has good in them, doesn’t mean it outweighs the bad. Sometimes it does. But you can’t force out the parts that you want; the parts that you need. Maybe I just read into things too much and I see things that aren’t always there. But when you expect things from people, more often than not you’ll end up disappointed. You can’t make a person into someone that they’re not, however much you want to. Almost… But not quite.